RunPee.com

I love watching movies. I would rather sit down to a bad movie then a good book when push comes to shove (Kati thinks I'm insane for some of the bad movies that I have sat through). I figure that if a book is really that good it will be made into a movie eventually anyway so why waste many hours on the couch reading when I can wait for the abridged 2 hour version in motion picture form?

But if you're like me, when you go to the theater, you sneak in a 20oz. soda with you as to not have to pay the outrageous prices at the concession stands. The idea is to try and make the aforementioned soda last the duration of the movie for two purposes. First, so that you have something to wash down the Hot Tamales that you also snuck into the theater and second, you think that if you drink the soda slowly then you will be able to last the entire movie without having to escape to the john. This second purpose, no matter how noble, never works. Soda has some strange chemical in it that somehow doubles the quantity swallowed when it hits your stomach. Don't ask me how, but trust me I've seen studies.

Now you're left with the dilemma of "When can I make a run for the loo?". If you had read the book prior to seeing the movie you might have a pretty good idea of when you can escape since you know, within reason, what is going to happen next. But if you know what's going to happen next then why did you just pay $10 to see the movie. That's like having someone tell you they are going to punch you in the snot box and then paying them to do so. But I digress. Back to the original question "When can I make a run for the WC without missing a key element of the plot?". Enter RunPee.com, where you can find the exact amount of time into a movie you can make a run for the can. The beauty of this it that it does so without ruining the movie. Example, if I wanted to know when to hit the head during the movie Up, I know that I could go at approximately 30 minutes in "when the doberman and the bulldog appear out of the bushes." No spoiler there. Although there is a little spoiler that can be unscrambled if you really need to know how long until you can go.

The other benefit that I have found to this website is that it is a great tell as to whether a movie is really worth your time at all. The more pee breaks you have the more likely that it's not. For example Drag Me To Hell and Star Trek each have six pee breaks, that equals down time or no progress in the plot and that's bad. But you can't use this as a fail safe plan since Hannah Montana: The Movie only shows one pee break point, the reason is that the entire movie is one long pee break, you're not going to miss anything by missing a minute or an hour of this movie.

So rest well knowing that someone out there is looking out for the little man.